oh dear.

i know not what to do. as maybe you know, i am not in chicago. and here lies old franny in chicago, ze blog that at times helped dust off some pretty fucking scraped up knees and write through my tears. ze blog that helped me say HEY! I'M HERE! OKAY. okay. phew. chill. drink some chai. eat some leaves and tomatoes (yoga food as my brother says) and just lay your head on your goddam pillow ya son of a building block and smoke a cig while you drink your coffee while you wonder about love while you wonder about life while your heart bleeds while your mouth turns up and l a u g h s.

i don't know what i'm doing. no one really does and oh miss, you packed your stick and a blanket too. tie it up with your shorts, your lipstick and your booze and hitchhike out into this scratched-up galaxy. for good. meow.

but my friends oh my friends

my true true loves of my lifers

i can't tell you that

i don't miss with pangs in my chest the hug hand and quick drive to your house

life goes forward yours and mine

hiding my sensitivities behind everything

a thinly veiled disguise

like the moustache fake nose glasses kind

like when you febreezed your shirt in high school

like when you dress up your dog

it's still a dog

and its shameful eyes will tell you

what its bark cannot

there are so many things i cannot actually say

outloud

and the only thing we will do now is collect our togetherness

on a dusty shelf

and bring it back out again and dance 'til we're drunk and drink 'til we dance

but in my heart you know i have tears that fell and down they dropped and

to the ground i hope those little flowers bloom into memories of me and you

me and you

and the love in between the tick tick tock

of our beautiful clock.

xoxo fran

she found her courage in a change of scene. she would try her chances somewhere else. -little joy