in the past several months.

i've moved and moved and moved again. and packed and packed and packed again. sorted and let go of many a thing. surfed from couch to couch to bed to bed and then finally committed to one place, to lay my head (still, buying a teapot was okay- but buying a bed: frightening). started a new job, the day after an interview, which was the day after uh, a rather large and raucous music festival. lived in the country for a couple of weeks. took some chances with my heart. floundered, flustered and turned up in love (and falling). reconnected with very, very old and amazingly creative friends. prayed in the mountains, dug up the earth with my hands. did a triathlon without training. without testing the bike or the wetsuit or, well, even running beforehand. cried with my grandmother on the anniversary of our guy's ticket to the sky. met and fell in love with forty-one kindergartners and began a climb that starts and ends with a loyalty and responsibility, fragility care and heavy dose of daily love. and consistency. and respect. and yet sometimes, i still wake up wondering where am i? and how? and how can a heart and mind be in many places? well it can. and it's really not the worst thing. and even though i've tried to rely heavily on what courage i hope will be there. it's still, scary. and i don't feel brave at all. often. promising as a resolution to rest and let go and continue to bend, move, cave, stretch and fall. xxx franny eff baby